Sad reality in health care

I took my mother in law to the hospital emergency when she was 90 years old. By some clerical error, the waiting paper work showed her as 80 years old. When I pointed out the error to a nurse who came into the room to check on her while we were waiting, she cautioned me in a low voice to not say anything as she would receive better care if they thought she was 80 than if they knew she was 90.

Two years ago an elderly friend of mine was taken to emergency by another friend. From the vehicle, she walked into emergency feeling nauseated. She was admitted, and three days later when she saw her doctor, he told the family she had lived a good life (she was 85) and it was okay to let her go and did not provide any treatment for the condition that he diagnosed, congestive heart failure. She'd had no heart problems prior to this experience. Long story short, 10 days later she died after being not fed any food and kept sedated on oxycontin which she was being given because she had a sore back. She was barely conscious until she died. The family simply took the doctor's word and didn't question. I have never gotten over this experience and have seen variations of it several times since - "they've lived a good life - no need to try."